First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
you will always have a special place in my vag
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
