I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
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