What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize
