I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
