Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize