hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize