Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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