Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
You can't just leave with hair like that
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
