ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
