I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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