He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize