BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
