you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
