If you die in college, do you die in real life?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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