We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
