That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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