An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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