Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize