He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
