they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
