I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
