Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
