dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Randomize
