I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
it's like heaven, but drunker
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Randomize
