Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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