She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
