ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
