i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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