dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize