I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
