well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
