think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Randomize
