Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
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