Hey man sorry I got all grabby
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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