Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
