after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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