NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
