garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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