Me too!
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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