so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
