let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Randomize
