At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Randomize
