That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
