discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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