other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
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