I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
