Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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