She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
