she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
