I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Randomize
